My name is Leila; I am a 44-year-old female. I don’t drink, don’t smoke, eat healthily, love spin classes, swimming, and dancing. In November 2024, I was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer.
I was enjoying time with my fiancé and planning a wedding when it all started. My heart started feeling tight in my chest, and it hurt to eat. I’d had reflux before- around 10 years prior, but this was different. It started being painful to swallow food down, and I would cough sporadically too- with no other signs of a cold.
I thought it was my diet, cut down on high fat foods, spicy foods, dairy, meat, tough foods- you name it, I’d probably already cut it out. Each reduction helped at first, but then the heartburn and cough would start all over again.
I went to the doctor who gave me medications for heartburn and reflux, and eventually nausea when that started. I had to keep missing work, I tried Chinese medicine, a herbalist, nothing worked. I knew there was something wrong- but I never thought of Cancer!
My doctor referred me for an endoscopy. I lay down, the surgeon went silent, there was an atmosphere in the room.
When they told me I had Cancer, all I could think of was the way it would affect the wedding, shock turning my emotions off, until I heard ‘chemotherapy,’ then my world turned upside down.
We went away like zombies. I returned to work, trying to live my life as before, but everything and nothing had changed. I felt like I was in a bubble, peoples muted conversations floating round me. I sporadically broke down in tears, in the supermarket, at the pool, in the garden pegging out clothes. I felt so alone and wanted to scream often.
They did more scans and said it hadn’t spread.
I started choking on food and had to stop eating, at the hospital they fitted a nasal feeding tube. It was a big shock, and we were scared, but finally after months of pain eating, I was so grateful for the nutrition. No one likes using a feeding tube, but to this day, I know that tube saved my life.
Soon after, I started chemotherapy. It was hard, but I was glad to make a start at fighting this cancer. I was nauseous, I lost all my hair, including eyebrows and lashes. At times I felt desperate and scared it wouldn’t work. But my family, friends and husband got me through. I never lost hope.
I found OPA online because there is no esophageal support here in Wellington, NZ. I was so grateful! I am English, having moved here at 25. I tapped into the forums to ask questions about cancer. There were always others who’d been through it. What’s more- they cared because they had been through it too.
After my chemotherapy, I got bad gut issues and was so worried about our wedding! But the team got the meds right just in time, my nasal tube removed, and I was able to eat enough to enjoy it. It was a miracle. My family and friends helped, and we had a beautiful day in my mums garden, I wore a fantastic real-hair wig, got eyelash extensions and a dress with a long train. After the darkness, I felt like a princess!
We honeymooned in Northern New Zealand, 4 days after our return, and 4 days after our return, I was taken in for surgery.
The surgery was laparoscopic, so it had less impact, but it took 17-hours! A tricky one as it was so close to my heart and lungs.
I recovered well, but the neck incision got infected, so I endured three more surgeries, many different techniques including vacuum dressing before it healed 5.5 months after surgery.
My feeding tube (inserted during the operation) is out, I am eating soft foods and back to my physical job as a university librarian.
I started moving as soon as I could, even trying to walk with all my tubes and chest box in after surgery! It was slow at first, a few steps up from the house and I needed to rest. But I built strength gradually, my scars are healing, and I am now swimming, doing gym classes and dancing.
